Just when you think things are getting better, you get a big ol wake up call. It sounds like this "Juliann, What were you thinking? " And then it throws things at you- big, ugly, scary, rotten, messy things.
I wish I could say that January got off to a good start, but that would be a lie. I knew January was going to be a tough month for us, and it only seems to keep getting tougher. It seems as though every single bill that we have is due this month in large quantities. Also, as they always do, some unexpected things happen that are going to spread us even tighter. To make matters worse, I am only going to get about 9 hours a week at work this semester.
We had one last hope that we were hanging on to and it doesn't look like that hope is going to happen unfortunately. It was the one thing we wanted more than anything else in the world right now. And I am slowly accepting defeat.
The well is running dry and my hope is running out. My faith however, will remain plentiful. This has to be left in the Lord's hands. There is honestly no other way for it to work out otherwise. We are in need of a miracle. I know, I have to believe, that the Lord has a plan for us. It's probably killing him to put us through this now but he's saying to himself "just wait, I promise that what I have in store for you is worth it." I have to believe this. I have nothing else.
Hopefully we will survive these next couple of months. If not, who has dibs on the fish tank? TV? Cars? Let me know, I'm taking orders as of now.
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